Because real pictures of snakes are scary.

Because real pictures of snakes are scary.

One of my very favourite aspects about our new house is the fact that it backs onto a conservation area. As soon as we pulled up to look at the house, I saw the treeline in the backyard and envisioned sitting on the deck in the sun, conversing with the beautiful woodland creatures.

The first week in the house was very delightful on the woodland creature sighting scale.

Various squirrels, chipmunks, blue jays, pretty butterflies and even some bunnies came by to welcome us to the neighbourhood. How lovely! One afternoon I decided to do a little light weeding in the backyard by the fence. I pulled a few long weeds (pointed out by my mom as weeds – like I would really know otherwise), and heard – rustle, rustle, rustle – near to where I was working. Yay! A fun woodland creature!

Thinking it must be a bunny or hedgehog (apparently we have them), or something of that nature, I bent ohsonear to where the rustling was coming from. And then I saw it – that long, black, and yellow body slithering around. A garter snake.

I panicked.

I yelled some sort of abnormal expletive, and took off like a shot. I booted it inside, shutting not just the screen door, but the glass one too, for good measure. No snakes inside, thank you! My next plan of action was to run and hide in the basement. My husband was down there and he just stared, laughing at me. He, obviously, has not seen a snake in the wild.

Apparently, there is one bad thing about living so close to a beautiful forest – there are snakes.

Later that weekend, my friend Jackie came over and we investigated into the creature further. This is what we discovered:

  • They are good swimmers
  • They are bad climbers
  • They bite you
  • Raccoons eat them

Supposedly snakes are good for the garden. Some people even put snakes in the garden on purpose. I am not one of those people. In fact, I’ve written it a letter, an eviction notice if you will:

Dear Snake,

I don’t want you in my garden. You are scary.