Bumpy Road Pictures, Images and PhotosThey tell you what to look for – something unusual, something hard – but they don’t tell you about the actual panic when you notice a lump in your breast for the first time.

For about a month or so I had been feeling completely off. Stomach issues. Tired. Headaches. Heart palpitations. I was pretty much a mess. I’m also a bit of a hypochondriac, so I had been to the clinic and gotten 5 blood tests, a thyroid test, ECG and other fun things, and they had all turned up negative. I just had to go in for my once-every-two-year fun-time-ain’t-it-great-to-be-a-woman check-up and then I was going to be confident it was just the stomach flu.

Everything had gone as good as it goes, until I asked if she would show me how to do a proper self breast exam. Yup, okay, I guess I had been doing it right – until she stopped on this one area. Her next words were, “well, that’s a bit…”


Do you have a history of breast cancer in the family? No.
Have you been checked for fibroid issues before? No.

She calmly, naturally, gave me a green card and told me to go next door and book an ultrasound.

I found my way outside and looked down at the green card (which, oddly enough, is the colour of fertility and life), that had a check beside “Ultrasound” and at the bottom in beautiful, un-doctorly-like, flowery script: “Breast Lump”.

I was in a half-daze on the bus ride home, trying not to think of the worst. You hear of women that have had breast cancer and described their lump as being a pea, or a small ball with divots. This thing felt like a steak. And the only thing I could think of was how crappy this was going to be for my family.

The next few days sucked. Big time. Whenever you’re waiting for test results, it seems like no one else seems to care except you. Really? The earliest you can get me in is in three days? Then three days for results? Isn’t time a big deal with these things? So, I tried to keep my mind preoccupied with other things. These are the other things you should not preoccupy your time with:

  • Searching the internet for ultrasound pictures to compare what you saw out of the corner of your eye before the technician had a chance to change the images over
  • Watching House
  • Watching Grey’s Anatomy
  • Watching Dr. Oz

It also changed my relationship with my “THEM”. I didn’t want to look at them. I tried to put my clothes on without seeing them (this is quite hard to do), and I yelled at them a few times. We had a good chat about the fact I wasn’t happy with the way they were behaving. I told them to shape up.

Then there’s the whole: We’ll call you if there’s something wrong. Which also translates to: We’ll leave you hanging and worrying for an extra couple of days if you’re a-ok. In the end, I had to call them. They told me it was nothing. Everything looked clear.

And just like that, it was done.

I cried. I went home and told my family. I patched things up with THEM. We slowly re-established our friendship. I told them never to do that again.

So, what now? You hear that lumps are bad. But there could also be a fibroid the size of a t-bone roaming around in there that is completely harmless. Surround yourself with loved ones that will see you through anything. I feel so lucky every day to have such a caring family and an amazing partner in my corner. And please get anything that seems the least bit odd checked out. Now. Don’t put it off because you don’t want to hear the worst. We all know it’s best to catch these things early if it is a concern.
And hopefully, you just may be lumpy-bumpy.

Get checked out! Visit Cancer.ca for more info or to donate.